WEATHER BLETHER

BLOWY

The howls, the gusts,

The hedgerow sways,

The tree bends,

The honest truth

That nature sends.....

Strong winds and umbrellas

Are not the best of friends.......

......and they're not too fond

Of fence panels either!

WEATHER BLETHER

Whether or not the weather is nice,

Sunny and hot or cold as ice,

Whether or not the weather is nasty,

Windy and wet and just plain ghastly,

Whether the weather is whatever it is,

We can look out the window and see what we see,

Or we can weather the blether of the weather forecasters, 

blethering about weather on TV.

'TIS THE SEASON FOR CHRISTMAS TV ADS

'Tis the season for Christmas ads TV,
Time to roll out the cliches once again,
Goodwill to all children, women and men,
Ho, ho, ho and sentimentality.
Tables laden with tons and tons of food,
Lots of people clinking glasses: "Cheers",
John Lewis tugging heartstrings, maybe tears
As boy with penguin gets us in the mood.
Jingly bells and tinsel set the scene,
Trying for that warm pre-festive swoon,
Our eyes and ears tingle as the screen
Reminds us yer man Santa's coming soon,
But remember, lest business thinks we're green,
These ads were filmed in the middle of June.

MICK JAGGER'S CHATEAU

The old potter told us
that Mick Jagger's chateau
was not far away,

so we drove towards
Poce sur Cisse in the hope
that we would find it.

We think we did,
squinting through some snatches
of space in a high, thick hedge,

a magnificent white building,
majestic entrance steps,
immaculately tended gardens.

But, alas, in our vain search
for a glimpse or two
of rock star action,

we failed to spot Mick
and we didn't get
no satisfaction.

1967 ROCK 'N' ROLL BAND (LENNON, McCARTNEY, JAGGER, RICHARDS & GIBB)

We would gather

at the coal shed,

three of us, Sunday evenings,

with an out of tune guitar,

a battered cardboard box

and knitting needles for drums,

to sing and play

the hits of the day.

1967,

we were the Beatles,

the Rolling Stones,

the Bee Gees,

we were rubbish,

cack-handed, impromptu, ad-lib

but we were happy in our dreams

to be Lennon, McCartney,

Jagger, Richards and Gibb.

3 WEE POEMS

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FOR A CHANGE

The laugh,

The chuckle,

The guffaw,

The smirk,

The smile,

The grin

Decided for a change

To have a miserable night in.

LOSER

Bought a ticket for the Lottery,

It lost, so what have I gottery,

Er, not a lottery!

BEAR

A polar bear has furry hair

Or else he’d be a polar bare.

CUDDLY CAT POEMS X 4

1

FEE LINE

The day the cat

swallowed cash

was not a cause for pity

for after all

the end result

was money in the kitty

2

FELINE SORE

A cat chap

had a mishap

with a cat flap

due to back slap

3 

KNIT CAT

Our cat married a ball of wool

because he was totally smitten

and very soon 

they were blessed

by the birth of a newborn mitten

4

PURRFECT

Intelligent cat,

meticulous cat,

when she was writing a letter

would work at the language

and aim for perfection, 

so she would get better and better.

Other cats sneered, 

insulted, derided

and call her a swot and a wuss,

but intelligent cat

stayed calm for she was

content as a grammar puss.

NOT ALL

Not all soldiers are heroes,
Not all enemies are evil,
Not all devils are god,
Not all gods are devil,
Not all we hear is true,
Not all we see is clear,
Not all we feel is threat,
Not all we sense is fear.

Not all.
But most.