VAC PANIC ATTACK

From my forthcoming book of funny/silly poems - The Chuckle Files.....

I don’t know if you care,

I don’t know if you’re fussed

But I’m worried our vacuum cleaner’s

Allergic to fluff and dust.

I swear sometimes

I hear it wheeze.

I reckon sometimes

It’s about to sneeze.

Back and forward

Across the floor,

I thought it cried:

“No more, no more.”

Behind the sofa,

Dust and fluff,

Under the bed:

“Enough, enough.” 

I switched it off

And sat it down,

Delivered a lecture

With the sternest frown.

“If you’re unable

To clean a room,

You’ll lose your job,

‘Cos I’ll buy a broom.

“If you’re unable

To clean the floor,

It’s over between us,

I’ll show you the door.

“If you’re unable

To clean a mat,

Well………

That’s that.”

Whatever I said,

The vac, alert with a jerk,

Dusted itself down

And got back to work.