From the forthcoming book Rolling In The Aisles, Funny Stuff About Shops, Shoppers & Shopping......
In a Waitrose café, sits a pelican,
Whose mouth can hold more than his belly can,
I swear his huge beak
Can store food for a week,
It’s a puzzle to know how the hell he can.
In a record shop near Dundalk,
To a staff member I started to talk,
I said “Scuse me, please,
Have you got the Bee Gees?”,
He said: “No, it’s the way that I walk.”