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Monday, 23 September 2013


From Juggling Jelly - book available from

My dog ate my homework,
As blatant as could be,
He set his kennel table
In readiness for tea.

He laid his doggy fork and knife,
His napkin and his sauce,
And while I was distracted
Grabbed my essay as main course.

For dessert he fancied history
And gobbled down the lot,
Then onto maths and geography,
What an appetite he’d got.

He grabbed my homework pages
In his slobbery-gobbery jaws,
Munched and crunched and chewed
Without a breath or pause. 

Now I know what you’re thinking
And the teacher thought it too,
That I made the whole thing up
Because that’s what children do.

But I swear it really happened,
Well, it’s almost, nearly true,
Except the kennel table,
Fork and knife and napkin too.

There’s some exaggeration,
But my dog’s a canine cad,
He really ate my homework
Because he’s barking mad.

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