HIS CHAIR

The chair
was his chair.
He is no longer there
but the chair
is still his chair.

Why do we stand
next to an empty chair?
He is not there
but he's always there.

It is still his chair.
It will always be his chair.

ON THE FONT FOOT

ON THE FONT FOOT

I like this font. (Times New Roman)

I like this font. (Abadi MT Condensed Bold)

I like this font. (Apple Chancery)

I like this font. (Arial Black)

I like this font. (Bank Gothic)

I like this font.  (Bauhaus 93)

I like this font. (Bookman Old Style)

I like this font. (Cooper Black)

I like this font. (Princetown let)

I like this font. (Mistral)

I like this font. (Stencil)

But most of all, my favourite font is

The font of all wisdom

BRING ON THE BOMBS AND BULLETS

Bring on the bombs and bullets,

We've run out of things to say,

Bring on stretchers and body bags,

Take the dead and wounded away.

Bring on the justification

For massacres and landscapes destroyed,

Bring on the spin and the bullshit

To justify the methods deployed.

Bring on the bombs and bullets,

We've run out of things to say,

Let's get this war completed,

For there's another one on its way.

CHIPPY

"Chippy" from "Juggling Jelly" BOOK: http://www.feedaread.com/books/Juggling-Jelly-9781782994312.aspx 

One potato,

Two potatoes,

Three potatoes,

Four,

Five potatoes,

Six potatoes,

Seven potatoes,

More.....

I peel 'em,

I wash 'em,

'Til my brain turns dippy,

Another long night

In the kitchen of the chippy.

Why do I do it,

When I'm a miserable bod?

Well I see it as my calling,

For the love of cod.

ATTENTION PASSENGERS

This is exactly what I heard over the tannoy during a flight today........

Bing-bong: "Crackle, squelch, blether, seat belts, blah, shriek, squeal, sputter, mumble, mutter, squeak, shriek, whine, hiss, sandwiches, crackle, squelch, blether, blah, shriek, squeal, hot drinks, sputter, mumble, mutter, squeak, shriek, whine, hiss, scratch cards, crackle, squelch, blether, blah, shriek, squeal, sputter, mumble, no smoking, mutter, squeak, shriek, whine, perfumes, hiss........"

CUE A QUEUE, THEN CUE ANOTHER QUEUE

Today's post draws attention to a wonderful Roger McGough poem, "Q", taken from the http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/q/ website.  
If I've breached any rules in reprinting this poem, I'll remove it. But it seems to be in the public domain."





Q

I join the queue
We move up nicely.

I ask the lady in front
What are we queuing for.
'To join another queue,'
She explains.

'How pointless,' I say,
'I'm leaving.' She points
To another long queue.
'Then you must get in line.'

I join the queue.
We move up nicely. 

Roger McGough

PAXMAN'S BEARD

Newsnight, Newsnight,
Nerves and fright,
Brought on by Paxman's
Bark and bite.

And now politicians
Are even more a-feard
For Paxman's grown
A sinister beard.

WORLD OF FUNNY NOISES

This is my world of funny noises,

My land of chirp and swoosh,

Of rustle, hiss, moo and hoot,

Of screech, quack and caw.

This is my world of funny sounds,

Of gush, snap, crackle, fizz and splash,

Of click-clack, tick-tock, swish and ping,

Of splish, squish, squash, ding and clang.

These are the noises in my funny world,

My clank and tinkle, my chomp and sizzle,

My snuffle, whack, thwack and gurgle,

The pitter-patter atchoo of my whizz-popping self.

HUNTED

I've killed just about everything that walks or crawled at one time or another.” Will Munny, Unforgiven

Behind me,

The crack of a snapping twig.

Look around, scan the trees

And the gaps in between,

Listen beyond the breeze,

Nothing more heard, nothing seen.

Who or what?

A dog, a wolf,

A scavenger, a crazy man,

A bandit, a ghost,

Fairies, elves?

Twigs don't snap themselves.

(From "Jack Elam, I Gave You The Best Years Of My Life")